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TroutnutOctober 22nd, 2006, 12:34 pm
Bellevue, WA

Posts: 2736
Here's an amusing story on ABC News.

Bluegills are sensitive? Really? Somebody should tell the DoD about brook trout.

The article includes a pretty amusing quote from an army biologist:

"Our command structure views it as a deterrent, you let them [the terrorists] know that you have this," he said.

"Step back, Osama! We have bluegills and we're not afraid to use them!"

Because fish are inherently complex beings, the IABS uses eight bluegills to ensure accuracy.

So, to count up the US armament...

Nuclear warheads: 24,854
Bluegills: 8

Nobody will mess with us now!
Jason Neuswanger, Ph.D.
Troutnut and salmonid ecologist
GONZOOctober 22nd, 2006, 1:16 pm
Site Editor
"Bear Swamp," PA

Posts: 1681
I feel so much safer knowing that coughing bluegills are standing guard over our water supply. Perhaps there's a species that could assist in the search for WMDs. The walking catfish comes to mind. And should we need assault troops, there's always the SNL land shark.

On second thought, I'm sure that PETA would find some reason to object to all of this....Never mind.
TroutnutOctober 23rd, 2006, 10:30 am
Bellevue, WA

Posts: 2736
On second thought, I'm sure that PETA would find some reason to object to all of this....Never mind.

Maybe, but bluegills have been getting a free ride for far too long. It's about time some of them served their country, instead of getting served to their country...
Jason Neuswanger, Ph.D.
Troutnut and salmonid ecologist
TaxonOctober 23rd, 2006, 11:05 am
Site Editor
Royse City, TX

Posts: 1347
I hesitate to interrupt the humorous banter, but you guys are just too funny. It's actually bringing tears to my eyes.
Best regards,
Roger Rohrbeck
GONZOOctober 23rd, 2006, 2:40 pm
Site Editor
"Bear Swamp," PA

Posts: 1681

Your play on words reminded me of an old television program. I can't remember if it was a Twilight Zone or an Outer Limits episode, but it was about aliens visiting the earth. As I recall, the title of the episode was "To Serve Man." I don't know if you've ever seen it, but I'm sure you can imagine the double-entendre, Soylent Green type of twist the plot took.
Fly_TyierJanuary 7th, 2007, 7:14 pm

Posts: 5
I feel extreamly safe now that they have a bluegill army up and running, or hopping? would bluegills run or hop? thats going to puzzle me for awhile. lol.
BrettJanuary 8th, 2007, 9:46 am
Martinsburg, WV

Posts: 15
Dear Sirs:

I humbly request a small contingent of your best-armed (best-eared?) bluegill be sent to the lower Potomac watershed. Just as the Brits in 1812 infiltrated our country through the Chesapeake Bay, so too are the exotic Asian snakeheads. Maryland and Virginia DNR have found many waiting in ambush in the aquatic vegetation near Gen. Washington's Mt. Vernon. Current snakehead numbers are unknown but armaments consist of dozens of sharp teeth, highly armoured exteriors, and primitve lungs making amphibious landings possible. I'll await your schools of reinforcements.

Your humble servant,
Specialist Brett Billings
(US Army, honorably discharged)
Novice entomologist, fly-tyer and photographer
CaseyPJanuary 8th, 2007, 9:58 am
Arlington, VA/ Mercersburg, PA

Posts: 653

is it okay to keep the next bluegill i catch just to test my kitchen faucet water? here in Arlington, just outside Washington, the tap water kills aquarium fish.
"You can observe a lot by watching." Yogi Berra

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